Is Self-Love a Sign of Selfishness?

Understanding the concept of 'self-love' and distinguishing it from 'selfishness' from the perspective of the Holy Quran requires a deep reflection on the fundamental teachings of Islam. The Quran does not directly use the contemporary terms 'self-love' or 'selfishness,' but it provides principles and foundations that clearly separate these two concepts. The answer to this crucial question lies in comprehending the Islamic principle of balance (wasatiyyah) and human responsibility towards oneself and others, which are central tenets of the Quran. On one hand, Islam places significant importance on the preservation and care of the *nafs* (soul and body). Our body is a trust (amanah) from Allah, and taking care of it—including proper nutrition, adequate rest, hygiene, and avoidance of anything that harms physical or mental health—is not merely permissible but considered obligatory. This constitutes a form of 'self-love' that means safeguarding and maintaining this divine trust so that an individual can optimally fulfill their spiritual and social duties. The Holy Quran encourages people to enjoy Allah's blessings and not deprive themselves of them through excessive asceticism or unreasonable self-denial. In fact, self-purification (*tazkiyat al-nafs*), which was a primary objective of the prophets' missions, necessitates attention to various existential dimensions of a human being so that they can achieve perfection. Verses 9 and 10 of Surah Ash-Shams explicitly highlight the importance of this: "He has succeeded who purifies it (the soul), And he has failed who corrupts it." (Quran 91:9-10). This verse indicates that striving to cleanse the soul from negative moral traits and adorning it with virtues is not only commendable but is the path to salvation and success. This purification is a constructive form of 'self-love' that propels an individual towards excellence and prepares them to play a better role in society and before Allah. Furthermore, maintaining human dignity and self-respect (not arrogance or conceit) is also an Islamic teaching. Allah has appointed humanity as His vicegerents on Earth and has endowed them with inherent dignity; therefore, anything that harms this dignity is deemed undesirable. This self-respect is an instance of positive self-love. On the other hand, 'selfishness' in Islam refers to the excess of self-love, prioritizing personal interests over any moral, religious, or social principle. This is where the boundary between healthy self-regard and detrimental selfishness becomes clear. Selfishness is rooted in pride (kibr), greed (tamma'), covetousness (hirș), and arrogance, all of which are condemned moral vices in the Quran. Selfishness leads an individual to disregard the rights of others, engage in oppression and injustice, and move away from the values of altruism and generosity. The Quran strongly criticizes those who are solely concerned with their own interests and refuse to help the needy or observe community rights. In Surah Al-Qasas, verse 77, Allah beautifully articulates balance: "But seek, through that which Allah has given you, the home of the Hereafter; and [yet], do not forget your share of the world. And do good as Allah has done good to you. And desire not corruption in the land. Indeed, Allah does not like corrupters." (Quran 28:77). This verse clearly shows that utilizing blessings for the sake of the Hereafter and enjoying a legitimate share of this world, coupled with doing good to others and avoiding corruption (of which selfishness is a primary cause), is desirable to Allah. True selfishness is when an individual resorts to corruption and injustice to fulfill personal desires, or refuses to help others due to avarice and stinginess. Conversely, the quality of 'altruism' (ithar) is highly praised in the Holy Quran. In Surah Al-Hashr, verse 9, Allah states: "And [also for] those who were settled in al-Madinah and [adopted] the faith before them. They love those who emigrated to them and find not any want in their breasts of what the emigrants were given but give [them] preference over themselves, even though they are in poverty. And whoever is protected from the stinginess of his soul – it is those who will be the successful." (Quran 59:9). This verse praises the pinnacle of sacrifice and selflessness, identifying the stinginess of the soul (*shuhh al-nafs*), which stems from selfishness, as a cause of failure. In this verse, *shuhh al-nafs* is mentioned as a major obstacle to salvation. *Shuhh al-nafs* is a state where a person is not only miserly in spending wealth but also rigid in every other aspect, including sacrifice and forgiveness, prioritizing their own interests above all else. This is precisely what we now refer to as 'extreme selfishness,' and it is strongly condemned by the Quran. Therefore, if 'self-love' means taking care of one's physical and mental health, purifying the soul, acquiring knowledge and moral virtues, and preserving human dignity in alignment with serving Allah, it is not selfishness; rather, it is a prerequisite for growth and flourishing. However, if self-love leads to extremism and means prioritizing personal interests over justice, the rights of others, and divine values, then it transforms into detrimental selfishness, which is condemned by the Quran. Islam calls us to moderation and balance; we should neither love ourselves so much that we neglect others and trample on their rights, nor neglect ourselves so much that we lose the ability to serve ourselves and society. The ultimate goal is to achieve a 'tranquil soul' (*Nafs al-Mutma'innah*) that, in perfect balance, cares for itself and does good to others, thereby attaining Allah's pleasure.