How do I know I am not despairing of God's mercy but also being realistic?

Understanding how to be realistic while maintaining unwavering hope in God's boundless mercy, and avoiding the pitfall of despair, is one of the profound challenges and crucial lessons of a faith-filled life. This issue has deep Quranic roots, and Islam provides clear guidance on the matter. The Holy Quran repeatedly emphasizes that one should never despair of Allah's mercy, for despair is considered a major sin and a gateway through which Satan enters the human heart. In Surah Az-Zumar, verse 53, Allah says: "Say, 'O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful.'" This hopeful verse, not only for sinners but for anyone facing life's hardships and feeling overwhelmed, serves as a reminder that the doors of divine mercy are always open. But what does realism mean in this context? Realism implies a correct understanding of the laws of the universe, one's own capabilities, limitations, and the recognition that every outcome requires preliminaries and means. Islam has never advocated for inaction or a type of reliance on God (Tawakkul) that negates the use of intellect and effort. The concept of 'Tawakkul' in Islam means making the utmost effort and striving, and then entrusting the outcome to Allah. This means a person should exert all their strength, utilize every legitimate means, and plan diligently, but without becoming overly dependent on the means or the immediate results. Instead, their heart should be firmly attached to the Creator of those means. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) famously told a man who had left his camel untied, claiming to have relied on Allah: "Tie it and then rely [on Allah]." This hadith clearly illustrates that proper Tawakkul complements action; it does not replace it. So, to discern whether we are being realistic or leaning towards despair, we should pay attention to several signs. Firstly, after making logical effort and striving, do we still possess a calm and hopeful heart regarding Allah's bounty, or have we fallen into despondency and isolation? A realistic individual understands that setbacks and difficulties are an integral part of life, but they do not consider them the end of the road. They know that Allah is "Khair-ul-Hakimin" (the best of judges) and that even in what appears to be undesirable, there is hidden wisdom. This understanding of divine wisdom helps a person to be patient in the face of adversity. Patience (Sabr) is another key virtue repeatedly mentioned in the Quran. In Surah Al-Baqarah, verse 153, Allah says: "O you who have believed, seek help through patience and prayer. Indeed, Allah is with the patient." Patience here does not mean inaction or silence in the face of problems, but rather resilience, steadfastness, and continuing efforts despite difficulties. Secondly, are we still seeking solutions and learning from past experiences, or do we find ourselves in a mental dead end? Realism demands that we meticulously assess situations, understand our strengths and weaknesses, and make decisions based on available information. If a desired outcome is not achieved, instead of surrendering to despair, we should try new approaches and seek guidance and help from Allah. This approach is similar to a traveler who reaches a dead end on a journey; instead of sitting down and weeping, they re-examine the map and find another route. Faith in Allah and His promises serves as a roadmap that never leaves us in an absolute dead end. Thirdly, the primary difference between realism combined with hope and mere despair lies in the outlook towards the future. A despairing person views the future as dark and unchangeable, thus abandoning effort. However, a realistic individual who hopes in divine mercy sees a ray of hope even in the darkest moments. They understand that change and transformation are divine traditions, and Allah is the All-Powerful Who can make any impossible thing possible, provided the servant has fulfilled their duty. This perspective empowers individuals to learn from difficult situations, repent from their mistakes (make tawbah), and move towards the future with renewed vigor. Despair is a poison that destroys human creativity and dynamism, while hope, even in adverse conditions, is the driving force for progress and effort. In summary, to understand this balance, we must examine our actions and inner states: Do we actively strive and then entrust the outcome to God? After setbacks, do we have the capacity to regroup and start anew? Does our faith in Allah's power and mercy keep us away from absolute despair, even when circumstances seem contrary to our desires? If the answers to these questions are affirmative, then you are treading the correct path of realism and hope in divine mercy. This delicate balance not only leads to inner peace but also enables one to move towards perfection and divine pleasure with reliance and hope in every situation. So, strive, plan, utilize your intellect, and ultimately rely on the endless mercy and wisdom of Allah, for He is the Best of Planners.