Why Doesn't the Feeling of Loneliness Go Away Even With God?

The feeling of loneliness is one of the deepest and most complex human emotions, experienced by many, even those who believe in God and strive to connect with Him. This is a profound and thought-provoking question, and its answer must be sought in a deeper understanding of the human-God relationship and the very nature of this emotion. The Holy Quran, our guiding scripture, opens windows into comprehending this issue, teaching us how to manage this feeling and attain true tranquility. Firstly, it is crucial to acknowledge that Allah, the Exalted, is always the closest being to humanity, at every moment. The Quran states in Surah Qaf (50:16): “And We have already created man and know what his soul whispers to him, and We are closer to him than [his] jugular vein.” This verse clearly demonstrates that Allah is never distant from us; His presence encompasses our entire being. If we truly comprehend this reality, theoretically, there should be no room for loneliness, as we constantly have an absolute and unparalleled Companion with us. So, why does this feeling sometimes persist? The reasons can be multifaceted: 1. Quality and Depth of Connection: At times, our connection with Allah might be more about outward rituals and appearances than a profound, heartfelt bond. Prayer, supplication (dua), and remembrance (dhikr), although virtuous and essential acts, might not bring about true tranquility and connection if they are performed without presence of heart and reflection on their meanings. The Quran says in Surah Ar-Ra'd (13:28): “Those who have believed and whose hearts are assured by the remembrance of Allah. Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah hearts are assured.” This verse emphasizes that true peace is achieved through “dhikr Allah,” which means a heartfelt and continuous remembrance of God, not merely the repetition of words. When the heart is truly engaged in the remembrance of God, there remains no room for loneliness, as the soul has connected to its primary source of peace and security. 2. Nature of Loneliness: The feeling of loneliness can manifest in various forms. One type is “spiritual or existential loneliness,” which stems from a detachment from meaning, purpose, and absolute truth. This type of loneliness can only be alleviated by a connection with God. Another type is “social loneliness,” which relates to a lack of human connections, friends, and family. Islam places great emphasis on community building, maintaining kinship ties (silat al-rahim), and helping fellow human beings. If an individual is socially isolated, even with a strong connection to God, they might still experience social loneliness. The Quran encourages us to live in a community and to help one another (as in Surah Al-Ma'idah 5:2: “And cooperate in righteousness and piety, but do not cooperate in sin and aggression”). Therefore, part of addressing loneliness involves active participation in society and fostering healthy relationships. 3. Divine Trials and Wisdom: Sometimes, the feeling of loneliness can be part of divine trials. Allah tests His servants with difficulties and various emotions to strengthen their faith and help them attain higher levels of knowledge and patience. This feeling can serve as a catalyst for individuals to turn more earnestly towards Allah and embark on a deeper journey within themselves. In Surah Al-Baqarah (2:153), Allah says: “O you who have believed, seek help through patience and prayer. Indeed, Allah is with the patient.” This verse indicates that when facing difficulties and unpleasant emotions, one should seek refuge in patience and prayer, because Allah is with the patient, and this divine companionship is itself the best remedy for any loneliness. 4. Overlooking Signs and Blessings: Humans sometimes become so engrossed in their problems and deficiencies that they overlook the signs of God's presence and the countless blessings He has bestowed. Focusing on what we lack can amplify feelings of inadequacy and loneliness, whereas gratitude for what we possess can fill the heart with contentment and a sense of divine presence. Every breath, every glance, every sunrise and sunset, every drop of water, and every morsel of food are all signs of His boundless presence and grace. If we look around with open eyes and grateful hearts, we will find ourselves immersed in an ocean of divine grace and presence. 5. Inappropriate Expectations from Religion: Some may expect religion to miraculously and instantly solve all their psychological and emotional problems, without requiring effort, contemplation, or, if necessary, seeking professional help. While faith provides a framework for peace and guidance, worldly life comes with its own challenges and human emotions. Faith helps us to confront these challenges in the best possible way, not to ignore them or expect them to disappear. Indeed, the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) himself, despite being the closest to Allah, experienced human emotions like grief and sadness, demonstrating that these are part of the human condition, and faith provides the strength to navigate them. Ultimately, the persistent feeling of loneliness, even with God, might be a signal to deepen one's connection, pay more attention to the social dimensions of faith, understand the wisdom behind divine tests, or reassess our expectations from faith. Allah is always near; it is our responsibility to reach out to this divine closeness with presence of heart, contemplation, gratitude, and righteous deeds, and to find true peace in His embrace. The more sincere and profound this connection, the more the feeling of loneliness will be replaced by a sense of presence, security, and perpetual companionship with the Lord. Let us remember, even in the most solitary moments, He is All-Hearing, All-Seeing, and our closest Friend and Companion.